You are in a dark and damp cellar with a narrow passageway leading north, and a crawlway to the south. On the west is the bottom of a steep metal ramp which is unclimable.
This area appears to be used as an office, as the large elaborately carved oak desk and office furniture attests.
Next to the desk sits a very expensive and powerful personal computer. A rodent of the Logitech breed scurries across the desk.
Situated near the mouse, a cyclopedian DigitalPersona U.are.U. fingerprint recognition system winks a single red eye.
Next to the desk in a rack sits a sleek black box which reads "EPSON Stylus Photo R200", underneath which a largish beige box displaying the prominent title of "HP LaserJet 4+".
Periodically, the computer screen flashes: "Where do you want to go today?" You have a sudden urge to buy Microsoft stock.
The personal computer contains:
The small file contains:
You may exit the cellar via the trap door overhead.